Today.

A year ago today was one of the worst days of my life. It was the day on which I was informed that my teaching contract at the school at which I had been working for three years was not being renewed.


That's all for today.

Friends.

     Why, hello! It has been a while, hasn't it?


     The last time I posted it was early February. There was snow on the ground, I was just starting my online course, and my sister was newly pregnant with an unsexed baby the size of an avocado. Now we are into full-blown spring, my course is almost over, I still haven't found gainful employment for the upcoming school year, my parents have been to Cambodia and back, and Mamacita's foetus is now known to be a girl the size of a large mango. (I'm fascinated by the app she's using that describes her unborn baby's size in relation to produce - last week babe was a spaghetti squash.) On top of this we've learned another very close friend is having twins due two months after my new niece is scheduled to appear. Those babies are lemons this week. Last week they were peaches. The expectant mamas use the same app. And what is new with you?

      I've decided to write about friends today. I've been thinking about friends a lot lately. I think in part because as the weather gets nicer I get more interested in leaving my hibernation hole, and am looking for friends with whom to spend time. It's hard to make friends as you get older - I've talked to a number of people recently about this topic. I've had some success making friends through Twitter, and this is why I call it my sandbox for grownups. You know how, as a kid, you walk up to another kid in the sandbox and either formally invite them to play with you by saying "hey, wanna play?" or even more organically, you just sit down with that child, figure out what he/she is playing, and just join in? That doesn't work so well as an adult. But I have invited a few women out for coffee after chatting on Twitter. In one case she then invited me to join her on an adventure and I stood her up and we haven't spoken since (which I feel very badly about, but because I know I was in the wrong, and am emotionally 12, I haven't been able to apologize. I know if she reads this here she'll know what I'm talking about and at least know how badly I feel about what I did to her). In the other case we have moved from coffee at a downtown shop to the more comfortable venue of our own homes, and I really value and enjoy the conversations I have with her.

Robert Smith - in case you are
not a child of the 80s
and the allusion meant
nothing to you.

     I've also been thinking about old friends. I'm not on Facebook, mostly because there aren't too many people from my past I want to reconnect with, but through Linkedin I've "been found" by two old friends in the last month or so. The first was my BESTEST friend in the whole world in high school. We grew apart as our lives followed different paths, but yesterday I went to Toronto to re-meet her after 20+ years and it was amazing. We hugged, and then just stood and looked at each other. It's quite something to see someone at 40 you last knew at 18 - so much the same, but enough different that it fries one's brain a bit. She's gained weight, but so have I. I have a lot more grey hair than she does. Neither of us wear our make-up Robert Smith style anymore (in fact, neither of us wear make-up!). Neither of us have had children. We have both found great men with whom to to settle down, and we both have cats. We spent the day wandering through our favourite old haunts (Queen W, Kensington Market, Yonge St) with our mouths running a mile a minute. When she had to catch her bus home to Guelph I was sad, but know that I'll see her again.

     The other Linkedin connection was a girl I befriended when she was the girlfriend of another friend of mine while I was at college. We stayed friends after they broke up, but somehow I lost track of her as well. (I'm realizing my memory is horrible. I blame being 40. I like to blame that for most of my failings, but mostly because it's funny, and socially acceptable, not because I think being 40 is bad.) Strangely, this girl contacted me the night before my other friend and I were scheduled to meet. This girl has moved to California since I knew her, so doubt we'll be meeting up any time soon, but I can't wait to find out what she's been up to in the last 15 years or so. I wonder if she still taps her cigarette in that awkward way, and laughs easily like she used to? I hope she's happier than she was when we were last friends. I'll find out when she emails me back!

This is Tiffy. Can you see why
I love her? She's so fun.

     I've also been thinking about three other friends - Jeskoka, a former co-worker and friend who I paid tribute to in my Grammar post, and miss very much despite the fact that we talk semi-regularly; Annie, who was my best friend in elementary school and with whom I've stayed in touch since on and off; and Tiffy, who was my best university friend and who holds the title of best friend to this day, despite the fact that she lives on the other side of this really big country and also despite the fact that I don't call her as much as I should. (I know, I know...). I want to call all three of them today. I probably won't, because I'm a horrible procrastinator and don't really like talking on the phone very much, but I feel like I'm closer to committing to doing it by blogging about it. Maybe they'll read this and know I'm thinking about them.


     I'm really proud of myself for blogging today. Earl and Mamacita (who I would also call friends, although I'm more likely to call Earl partner or husband (of the unofficial variety) and Mamacita is little sis) have been "bugging" me (in a loving way) to get back on my blog horse, so now I've done it. I now need to get back to my online course because a new module starts today (SIDE NOTE - every time I write or think the word 'module' I think 'nodule' and that's such a gross word.) and I haven't put my procrastination pants on yet, so might as well get at 'er. Hopefully I've got you thinking about your friends today. Call them. Right now.